’Twas the night before Christmas, and all of that crap
Commander Dax Harrison was caught in a trap
And SAMM hanging clueless in low-power rest
Was no help at all with their unwelcome guest
Dax woke with a daze, head ringing like a bell
Tied up on the bridge and confused as all hell
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear,
But a space pirate jackass, perusing his beer
"What the hell is this?!" Dax said in a huff
"A robbery, Commander. I’m taking your stuff."
Dax glared at the intruder and reached for his hip
And the thief gave a laugh that rang through the ship
Dax’s gun rested in a belt near his crotch
And now the rat bastard was taking his scotch!
"Come on man, it’s Christmas. I was saving that," Dax pled
"What for? Just yourself? That’s pathetic," he said
It was true, Dax was all by himself on this night
With not even a Yuletide one-night-stand found in sight
Though he’d never admit it, he felt it to the bone
For all his fame, Dax spent most Christmases alone
"What a dump!" The thief barked, and Dax took offense
To him, the ship was as home as a white picket fence
"Where’s all the shiny? All the creds? All the loot?"
"In banks," Dax laughed. "You think I stuff it in my boot?"
"Enough," said the pirate. "I’m taking your ship!"
And Dax lost all care to reply with a quip
He thought perhaps maybe the thief would see reason
What better time to try than the holiday season?
"Look, take the booze. I’ve got some to spare.
How ’bout we part ways and get out of each other’s hair?"
"How ’bout I space you?" He resolved with murderous glee
But then Dax cracked a smile. "No please, allow me."
As the thief pondered Dax’s sheer lack of defeat
The Commander watched SAMM’s startup sequence complete
"SAMM!" Dax shouted. "WE GOT A CODE BLACK!"
And he grabbed something sturdy as the thief was yanked back
Away through the airlock he flew like a flash,
As the sudden change in pressure made the whole damn ship thrash
The moon shining brightly on the jettisoned pirate’s face
Gave a small twinkling lustre in Martian colonial space
The A.I. worked swiftly and resealed the door
And Dax’s dinner settled after a brief internal war
"Commander," SAMM posed. "Have you tried making friends?
You might spend Christmas NOT dodging untimely ends."
Dax considered this a moment, but concluded instead:
"Merry Christmas, Sammy. I’m going back to bed."
Commander Dax Harrison was caught in a trap
And SAMM hanging clueless in low-power rest
Was no help at all with their unwelcome guest
Dax woke with a daze, head ringing like a bell
Tied up on the bridge and confused as all hell
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear,
But a space pirate jackass, perusing his beer
"What the hell is this?!" Dax said in a huff
"A robbery, Commander. I’m taking your stuff."
Dax glared at the intruder and reached for his hip
And the thief gave a laugh that rang through the ship
Dax’s gun rested in a belt near his crotch
And now the rat bastard was taking his scotch!
"Come on man, it’s Christmas. I was saving that," Dax pled
"What for? Just yourself? That’s pathetic," he said
It was true, Dax was all by himself on this night
With not even a Yuletide one-night-stand found in sight
Though he’d never admit it, he felt it to the bone
For all his fame, Dax spent most Christmases alone
"What a dump!" The thief barked, and Dax took offense
To him, the ship was as home as a white picket fence
"Where’s all the shiny? All the creds? All the loot?"
"In banks," Dax laughed. "You think I stuff it in my boot?"
"Enough," said the pirate. "I’m taking your ship!"
And Dax lost all care to reply with a quip
He thought perhaps maybe the thief would see reason
What better time to try than the holiday season?
"Look, take the booze. I’ve got some to spare.
How ’bout we part ways and get out of each other’s hair?"
"How ’bout I space you?" He resolved with murderous glee
But then Dax cracked a smile. "No please, allow me."
As the thief pondered Dax’s sheer lack of defeat
The Commander watched SAMM’s startup sequence complete
"SAMM!" Dax shouted. "WE GOT A CODE BLACK!"
And he grabbed something sturdy as the thief was yanked back
Away through the airlock he flew like a flash,
As the sudden change in pressure made the whole damn ship thrash
The moon shining brightly on the jettisoned pirate’s face
Gave a small twinkling lustre in Martian colonial space
The A.I. worked swiftly and resealed the door
And Dax’s dinner settled after a brief internal war
"Commander," SAMM posed. "Have you tried making friends?
You might spend Christmas NOT dodging untimely ends."
Dax considered this a moment, but concluded instead:
"Merry Christmas, Sammy. I’m going back to bed."
Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays to all! Here’s to a lovely year in books and many more to come! By the way, if you would like to give a humble fledgling author a small gift, a review on Amazon goes a long way! Also, you can now order personally signed copies of the book directly at DaxHarrison.com. (I still have a few extras on hand!)
-Tony
